Few months ago, my boyfriend and I broke up. I was devastated, I couldn’t accept it. I couldn’t understand why my best friend would abandon me. I remember how we had talked about what song we’d play on our first dance at our wedding but I couldn’t remember the song title. I told myself that I’ll search and search for the song online and if I couldn’t the song, I’d accept the break up (we hadn’t talked for a month or something at this point but I was so hurt). I couldn’t find the song. I almost became frantic, oh so frantic that I messaged him. Inquiring him about the title; it was a song he had chosen, and I liked it. But he couldn’t remember. It completely broke me. I took it as a sign to move on and accept the breakup. I don’t know why it was so important. Sorta like how Robin loses her necklace in How I Met Your Mother. I felt exactly like that.

Few months later, about five minutes ago, I remembered it out of the blue. I’m much better now, but I don’t know why it came to me. I remembered it was by the Bahamas and I remembered a part of the lyrics. I googled it and found it within minutes. I really wish I hadn’t. Because it just hurts so much more now.

ahhh I was feeling so much better, I feel like I just took a few steps back with my healing process.

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